11/12/2004

My parents screwed me up

Earlier I blogged about crying after I got lost in the hospital (which is huge by the way) which led me to think about how my parents have screwed me up mentally. I am 21 years old and I have this irrational fear of getting lost a phobia if you will. This stems from my parents being paranoid when they would take all four of us out at one time, as any normal parent would be I guess. Most of the time, it was either only my dad or only my mom (which was most of the time) that had all of us at the grocery store, park, bus, mall etc. They would make us all walk really close to each other. An example of this would be when we were at the grocery store, my mom/dad would have my youngest brother in a baby carrier backpack thing, my other brother in the shopping cart and my sister and I had to hang on to the cart and walk along side my parents (I still hang on to the cart to this day regardless of who is pushing).

My mom and dad would also warn me of strangers that would kidnap me, so I should not talk to strangers and run away if they did talk to me. An example of this is when my elderly neighbor's friend (who was very sweet by the way), said hello to me. I shouted at her that I couldn't talk to strangers and I ran home to tell my mom what a good girl I was.

When I was at department store with my parents (and not holding on to the cart) I would start crying or freaking out if either of my parents were not in the same aisle as me because I thought I was lost. Apparently things never change.

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